The Nursery

cribToday we are tearing down the crib, the changing table, the rocking chair and wallpaper that for the past 7 years has been “the nursery”.  It is the room in our house that I pass by everyday and probably my favorite room with it’s warm blue and yellow paint.  My favorite part is the white picket fence lining the far wall that my husband made.  All three of our boys have been rocked, changed, fed and cuddled in that room and it holds so many precious memories.

The reality of moving beds and people into different rooms has hit me harder that I ever thought it would.  I’m realizing that the “baby” stage of my life is done.  We are moving on to wonderful things – but the thought of NEVER having that experience again has been a hard one to process. 

As I laid our youngest in his crib for the last time last night I remembered what my mother-in-law said, “He may not be in the baby bed anymore, but he’ll always be your baby”.  She’s right.  I might be losing my connection to a location or furniture, but I’ll never lose my connection to my boys .  I guess I’m still learning what it means to embrace and enjoy the transitions that life brings. 

However, I’m discovering that these transitions, although bittersweet, keep some of their sweet bitterness even as time goes by.  My mother called last night to check on me and soon we were both in tears as she recalled how she felt after saying good night to me (in the exact same room by the way – yep, we bought my folks house) 9 years ago the night before my wedding day. Part of me was glad she still felt that kind of connection with her little girl – her baby – if you will.  I’m a grown woman, but I’m still her child and I’m so glad she sees me that way.

I’m excited for the years ahead and I’m okay with ending this chapter in my life.  But I’ve needed some time to say good-bye to what I’ve known for so many years. I’m especially grateful for my patient and supportive husband, family and friends.  No one should ever mother alone – too many emotions, hormones and events to process! Isn’t it wonderful that along with our earthly support we have a Creator who knit us together in our mother’s womb, who knows our innermost thoughts and who cares about the desires of our hearts.  I love the encouraging words from Psalm 37:3-5, 7.  The writer gives us specific instructions for how to deal with all the things that life can throw our way.  David writes:

3 Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.

 4 Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.

 5 Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this:

 7 Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him;

Each time I start to feel sad about the previous seasons of my life I will meditate on the challenges given to me in these scriptures.  I will 1. Trust in the Lord 2. Delight myself in the Lord (He is my light and my salvation) 3. Commit my ways to the Lord and trust Him  4. I will be still and wait patiently on the Lord (this one is going to be the hardest for me)

Will you join me in this parenting journey to let God be our everything?  He can be our all in all no matter where we live, what season we are in, what rooms are in our home or the age of our children.  God is on the throne and in control – I don’t have to be.  I believe we can all breathe a collective sigh of relief concerning that point :o) 

Enjoy your day as you trust, wait and delight in our Savior.

5 Responses to “The Nursery”

  1. 1 Jill Bluel August 8, 2009 at 8:44 AM

    Your entry made me cry too! I remember the day we moved to the “big girl bed” and said goodbye to the crib that had been through 4 kids. It was a happy time filled with emotion. I think we all look back & wonder if what we did was enough. I found your blog to be so encouraging! You are such a GREAT mom and a great friend. I am so glad you started this blog. I look forward to reading your entries and getting that encouragment we need as moms. It is an awesome job title, isn’t it?!!!!!

  2. 2 Angi Snyder August 7, 2009 at 3:35 PM

    I often grieve over the fact that my “baby phase” is over.” All I ever wanted to be was a mom, but I find myself grieving it away or wishing it away. Thank you for your encouraging words.

    • 3 Kasey Johnson August 7, 2009 at 5:56 PM

      Angi – well said. You are right, it seems we live at the extremes of wishing or grieving – either way it happens. I think you have the right idea though – childcare in your home for little ones helps remember how wonderful and yet time consuming it can be – you are such a great mom – I’m so glad you visited my little pet project. Come back again and give us all some good advice.

  3. 4 Cyndi August 4, 2009 at 7:51 AM

    Kasey, your entry made me cry. I’ve been dealing with a lot of the same emotions as we prepare for Brendan to start Kindergarten next week. What an exciting time, but my heart is full. My baby – off to school – Did it really go that fast? Thanks for sharing those verses from Psalms. I’ll be clinging to those with you.

    • 5 Kasey Johnson August 4, 2009 at 8:39 AM

      It’s nice to know I’m not the only one. No matter what is happening I think ANY transition is tough for moms and their kids. Not to suggest anything for you – but I cried on and off the entire day that Matthew was gone for the first time – I’ll be praying for you – and just think, our little guys will be able to enjoy the day together! :o) Thanks for your comment – have a great day!

Click here to leave a comment!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 1,133 other followers

Follow the Tweets!

What other moms like…


There was an error retrieving images from Instagram. An attempt will be remade in a few minutes.

%d bloggers like this: